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Developing Your Personal Communication Skills

Posted on December 6th, 2009

Personal communication can be a challenged especially when strong emotions, beliefs, principles or convictions are involved. These things may make it difficult for you to listen to someone else. Sometimes, you may find yourself willing to listen, but the other person wouldn’t be as generous. When this happens, you have to remember that the key to good personal communication lies on your willingness to let someone know that you are wiling to be there for the person and to listen to him or her.

I am Here! I am Listening!

The implication of this commitment to personal communication is huge. This means that you need to be fully present completely. You need to devote your entire attention to listening and understanding what the other person has to say. This means putting the person above anything else that you could be doing at that precise moment. It is saying, “There is nowhere else I’d rather be than here.”

You can’t allow your thoughts to wander and you can’t let yourself be distracted by other things. You need to devote your attention to the person you are talking to. Personal communication requires that you need to be in the present in order to hear what the other person has to say.

Acknowledge the Other Person

In order to get your commitment across, you need to acknowledge the other person. This is another secret to a successful personal communication. Everyone wants to be acknowledged and if a person is talking to you, he or she expects that you will acknowledge his or her presence as well. You also need to acknowledge the other person’s right to his opinions, thoughts and beliefs. You may not necessarily agree but you have to offer some form of validation. You need to show respect for the other person’s thoughts and opinions.

Manifesting Personal Communication Skills

You can definitely improve your skills for personal communication. You can start with friendly gestures like a smile or a positive greeting. These skills are particular important if you are working in a company. They will also help you especially if your job involves relating to people constantly. A smile will get you far. If you have employees, you need to make emphasize on the need for your staff to acknowledge people’s presence. No one appreciates being overlooked or ignored. It doesn’t take a lot to acknowledge people’s presence. Simple gestures often suffice. You just need to let the person know he or she is seen.

How to Listen Effectively

Regardless of the situation, you need to know how to listen effectively if you want to build a strong personal communication with another person. To some people, listening does not come naturally. If you are one of them, you may have to devote some time to learning and developing these skills.

When talking to someone, it is important that you know your intentions. Ask yourself, “Why should I listen to this person?” You need to be calm in order to connect more effectively. If you have a customer raging at you for a bad service, you will hardly be able to sort out the problem if you are not calm. The same technique can be used when dealing with personal issues with another person.

Now, the minute the other person speaks, you should direct your attention on him or her. Don’t let your mind wander. Many people fail to listen effectively because they do not really hear what the other person is saying because they are focused on figuring out what they are going to say next. In order to build better personal communication skill, you need to learn to empathize and you can only do this if you start listening. You will realize that if you would really bother to listen, you would eventually find yourself really interested to hear more.

Take time, however, to react. Take at least half a minute to respond. Process your thoughts, so you will know exactly the right thing to say. Many people do not bother to this, so they often end up with their foot in their mouth.

Personal communication starts with wanting to understand. This is actually the crucial characteristic of listening. The minute you have someone in need of your attention, make sure that you direct your attention to the person wholly.

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